Last night my mother called me to let me know that none of my friends have RSVPd for my bridal shower. She wants me to call them and ask if they’re coming. I have several problems with this.
1. It’s an invitation with RSVP and a phone number at the bottom. Grow the fuck up and respond already.
2. I’m not throwing myself the shower. I don’t know who was invited and who did or didn’t respond.
3. My mother’s not throwing the shower. Her sister is. Why the hell is she calling me?
As I was venting my frustrations to my future sister-in-law I got a phone call that made me forget about the shower entirely. I’m sure that it’s my fault. I got too cocky. I actually had the nerve to write about having a good day. It’s never a good idea for me to feel good about anything, because as soon as I do something else goes wrong.
Our wedding photographer called to cancel. She was very apologetic and very nice, and her reason (dying father-in-law) is completely acceptable, but for all of my understanding and common sense I couldn’t keep it together. Upon hearing the news that something I was counting on, something that I was excited about, and sure of, was no longer there, I burst into tears at my desk.
Now I’m just waiting for the rest. I’m not sure that no one responding to the shower invitation counts as something bad. If the photographer cancelling only counts as one negative event what else am I in store for? Will our honeymoon destination disappear into the ocean? Will our rabbi decide that I’m not Jewish enough? Perhaps our band will get stuck in a traffic jam, leaving us with nothing but a pipe organ. I’m done with being positive. Fuck it. My “expect the worst” attitude never leaves me brokenhearted. At least if I expect the worst I can be pleasantly surprised if nothing major goes wrong.
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