I can’t for the life of me remember how I thought of this so bear with me. Every now and again someone will say something that will stick with you for the rest of your life. Sometimes they’re good things, sometimes they’re funny, other times they’re just plain bad. For example, someone once said to me, “He was a chunky lad, he wore Husky pants.” Why that has stuck with me, I’ll never know, but there it is. Or the time my friend in the midst of wrestling silliness said, “don’t put your eye in my nose.” But the thing I remembered today really creeped me out.
When I was a kid, both sides of grandparents lived in Florida. My dad’s mom lived in a trailer park near Orlando, my mom’s mom near Miami beach. My mother hated staying with her mother and refused to stay in the trailer park, so every year we stayed at the same hotel during my Christmas vacation. This hotel, a resort actually, was huge. It had golf courses, tennis courts, a huge swimming pool, and an incredible program to keep the kids busy. They had a guy on staff who arranged sporting events for the kiddies. Another guy arranged field trips. There was a free game room that had 15-20 different arcade games for free. Because the place was contained, parents let the kids run wild. It was a child’s paradise. I had a whole group of Florida friends from all over the country- Colorado, Oklahoma, Chicago, New York- many of whom I stayed in touch with for years. From the time I was maybe 5 or 6 until I turned 11, we were there every winter break.
So for some reason I thought of being in the game room today. It was raining outside and I was there with all of my Florida friends. I was probably 10 or 11. There were these older boys from Canada there. They were probably 17 or 18. I remember thinking their accents were funny. One of the Canadians joined me for a 2 player game of Centipede. Out of nowhere, he turned to me and said, “When you grow up, you’re going to have the sweetest, juiciest pussy.” I must have stared at him blankly, because I don’t think I had any idea of what it meant at the time. I remember feeling embarrassed and humiliated when I learned what he meant later. It makes me feel ill just thinking about it.
Who the hell says that shit to a pre-teen?
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