girlfiend

After the funeral last week we stopped at Bushkill Falls to improve our moods and enjoy “nature.” Nature is in quotes because Bushkill Falls is not advertised as the Niagara of Pennsylvania because of the beautiful, scenic waterfalls, but because of that fact that it’s a crowded, overpriced tourist trap. The “nature center” was little more than a hot, stuffy room crowded with stuffed animals. Not the cute, cuddly kind, the beady-eyed, once-living-now-dead kind. My favorite was the dead fox with the even deader rabbit in it’s mouth. After handing our tickets to the collecter we looked at the map and chose the long route, the 2 and a half hour red trail that’s advertised as being for serious hikers only. We had an infant with us, and I had to stop several times to get my coughing fits under control, but I’m pretty sure that 2.5 hour route didn’t take us much longer than an hour to complete.

Many of the other tourists were orthodox Jews with the wigs and the beards and the talles (tallises? tallet?) hanging out of their shirts, and because we were in the middle of nowhere, where I didn’t even know that had Jews I kept wanting to stop and say, “Hi. I’m Jewish too. ” But Orthodox Jews aren’t so much into talking to strangers, especially the menfolk who aren’t supposed to look me in the eye, so I kept my enthusiasm to myself. It was a good time, but oddly disconnected to nature with the stairs and the crowds, and I’m sure the waterfalls are more impressive in the spring, as water in Pennsylvania is usually pretty low by the end of the summer. Nonetheless, we were inspired by our post-funeral outing and decided to take another roadtrip.

We left Sunday morning and headed to Hazleton, PA to visit with Boyfiend’s great-uncle for a bit before reaching Pottsville, our final destination where we planned to visit the Yuengling brewery and nearby Hawk Mountain. We got to the hotel in the late afternoon, hung out for a while, then had dinner at the Dutch Kitchen in Frackville. The Dutch Kitchen was basically Cracker Barrel without the chicken fried steak. Boyfiend wanted to order the croquettes and the waitress told him, “No. You don’t want them.” Boyfiend told her he did, but she said, “No. They’re dry. Get anything else on the menu, but not the croquettes.” I pointed to the description on the menu that proclaimed them moist and delicious, but she informed us the menu was wrong, so he ordered the sausage instead. We went back to the hotel after dinner, swam in the indoor pool, then retired to our room for the night.

Boyfiend’s big plan for the following day was to do the brewery tour in the morning, eat lunch in Pottsville, go back to the hotel for swimming in the afternoon, then return to Pottsville for dinner. The brewery tour was surprisingly fun, but kind of bizarre at the same time. As you walk through the brewery you’re actually walking through the brewery. People are working around you and there’s beer being made where you stand. The last stop on the tour is the bar where everyone’s given two samples. They serve the children and non-drinkers birch beer first, then they serve the real beer drinkers. I had the Premium and the Black and Tan. It was nice to get a free drink (the entire tour is free) but the samples weren’t especially exciting because when we have beer in the house it’s usually Yuengling anyway.

After the tour we drove up the hill to where the mansions are and walked around a bit then headed back into town for lunch. Boyfiend unfortunately didn’t realize Pottsville has absolutely nothing going on. The two main streets had some businesses open and a few delis and pizza joints, but the only decent restaurant was closed and the bars, which I’d imagine were smoky, didn’t open until after lunch anyway. We ended up at Roma Pizza, which was pretty good, but the Fiendling was all sorts of cranky so we left before I got to finish my sandwich.

Since we’d seen all that downtown Pottsville had to offer, we decided to go to Knoebels for the afternoon. That place is amazing. I have never been to such a family friendly amusement park. Because we were traveling with the Fiendling, we weren’t really able to take advantage of the rides, but admission was free, parking was free, and most rides were priced at under a dollar. They have an enormous pool, and the biggest wooden roller coaster in PA, which costs only $1.80 to ride. It was such a refreshing change from Great Adventure, where you have to wait in line for two hours to get on a roller coaster. Walking through the park is like stepping back in time. I don’t think I’ll ever go to Dorney or Hershey or Six Flags again after spending a few hours at Knoebels. Check out the website. It’s awesome.

Tuesday we went to Hawk Mountain Sanctuary for a hike. It was lovely. We hiked up to the North lookout which had panoramic views of close to 70 miles, and took the escarpment trail back. When we chose that particular route we were unaware that escarpment basically means steep and rocky. We were bouldering with the baby in a backpack. Probably not what the makers of the backpack intended, but it was a lovely afternoon. In fact, the whole trip was lovely.

This Sunday we’ll be pressing our traveling luck by heading back to the shore. It will be our last trip of the summer. I’m feeling nostalgic for the summer already.