girlfiend

I finally finished knitting a massive project. I laid it out to see how much blocking was required and my mother said, “What happened there? Did you drop a stitch?”

Thanks.

Mother’s Day wasn’t bad. The Fiendling spent Friday and Saturday night with my in-laws so we could get ready for the party on Sunday. The baby woke me up at 6.30. At 9 I woke B with coffee in bed. I was only slightly bitter.

The baby’s first birthday party was big and fun and the house is mostly cleaned up. We have more leftover cookies than we know what to do with.

His actual birthday isn’t until Wednesday. I’m not crying about it yet, but all of the newborns I see are brutal reminders that my baby won’t be a baby for much longer. I anticipate tears on his birthday proper.

I did something to my big toe. I’m not entirely sure what I did to it since it’s not bruised or swollen, but I’ve spent the last two days hobbling around. It is incredibly painful to walk without shoes. I must have pulled something. The few steps from bedroom to bathroom in the middle of the night are excruciating.

Speaking of the middle of the night, I just learned from B that I somehow managed to get him to take care of two middle of the night wakeups. Both F and T woke up and I have no memory of either. He says the Fiendling was at my side of the bed imploring me to get up and get him his water from upstairs and I made him go instead. He claims that he also rocked the baby back to sleep after I woke him up and told him to. I find this most difficult to believe. I posited that perhaps he dreamed it, but F remembers that he wanted me, not B to get his water and was sad that I did not. I must have been exhausted.

I went back to the pulmonologist this morning for my three-month check up. She wanted to put me on a lower dose of my asthma medicine but didn’t because I’ve been hanging on to a cough since we all got sick a few weeks back. (Shit, it was a month ago. ) She gave me a prescription for the lower dose and told me to cut back my current dose to once a day instead of twice over the next six weeks and see how I do. She asked if the summer would be a tough time to do it because of the heat and it sucks because I just don’t know. I started coughing the first summer after F was born and didn’t get an asthma diagnosis for a year after that. But it wasn’t until this fall that I was finally given an inhaler that actually controlled the asthma. After close to three years of non-stop coughing I don’t know what seasons are worse than others. Childbirth really did wreck my immune system.

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