garden

Again with the bullets

  • Farm to Philly is live and it’s really, really pretty. Take a look around. Even if you’re not local there’s probably something of interest.
  • About a week ago, maybe longer, I realized that I can no longer fit into my pants comfortably. I’ve been vacationing way too hard. So I drank a couple of beers and bought a skirt with an elastic waist. I may regret this decision come winter, when I don’t fit into anything without an elastic waist. Sadly, now that Boyfiend’s back at school the party will probably come to an end anyway.
  • But I’ve been eating well. I’m currently signed up for the September Eat Local Challenge. The rules are easy.

    1. Eat one meal per week during the month of September that is made using locally grown ingredients. Non-local oil and spices are allowed.
    2. Can, freeze, dry, or otherwise preserve two things during the month.
    3. Utilize one new resource for locally grown food during September - that could be a new restaurant, farmer’s market, etc.

    Sign up at Farm to Philly if you’re interested. Or check out the hardcore challenge hosted by the Eat Local Challenge site and the Locavores. I am not that hardcore, but it is nice to feel good about what I eat. Even when I can’t button my pants.

  • Tonight’s meal was almost a contender for my meal of the week. Chicken Enchiladas with fresh corn on the cob and steamed Swiss Chard. But the tortillas weren’t local and I just wasn’t up to making them myself. I’ll have to plan for something later in the week. I have potatoes that need to be used, so I may make gnocchi.
  • Other things that are local? The tomatoes, peppers, green beans, herbs, and eggplants (that haven’t been attacked by wildlife) from my garden. I’m already planning for next year. Many changes will be made.
  • The vodka watermelon did not work out as planned, but there was still vodka watermelon. I cut it up into chunks, let it soak in vodka for a day, froze it, then pureed it. At first I served it as it was, later I added seltzer, later still I added Trader Joe’s 100% raspberry juice. The raspberry juice also makes a nice addition to Margaritas made with mix (we ran out of limes and lime juice). The raspberry juice is a little tart and not too sweet. It balances the supersweet mix nicely.
  • I’m going back to work at the bagel place a couple of days this week and next. My old boss emailed me, desperate. My mom’s coming in to babysit while I’m at work. This could end badly- the part with my mom, not the part about me working there again. I wonder if Jessica Wakefield’s still working there.
  • Rosh Hashanah’s next week. I invited a bunch of people, only two of whom have responded. The rest of you are slackers, especially if you’re reading this right now. Open your email and write me back, bitches. There will be brisket and it will be delicious.
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    Busy day

    I spent a couple of hours with Tony in the morning then I had lunch with Gabbiana, Fraulein N, and Doodlebug at Honey’s Sit ‘n’ Eat. When I got home from Northern Liberties the Fiendling had just woken up from a nap. For some reason it was a bad wakeup. He was sad and clingy and fussy and he somehow fell and hit his head, leaving a scrape and bruise just under his eye. Wanting to cheer him up we took him for a walk to see the pig who lives around the corner. Visiting and petting the pig improved his mood drastically, so we walked up to the playground.

    It was a little before six and the playground was packed. An obese woman wearing short shorts sat on a bench with her husband while their tow-headed little girl wearing a blue dress, ruffled ankle socks and sparkly pink shoes played with a dark skinned boy whose mom watched from the low wall encircling the playground. A mom with a girl who was about a year old pushed her in the baby swing while smoking a cigarette. A little boy a few months older than the Fiendling was running around with his dad, a guy about my age who had tattoos covering the majority of one leg (do they still call it a sleeve when it’s on a leg?) and a tattoo of a rose on the other leg.

    The little boy went down the slide and his dad followed. An eighth of pot wrapped in a sandwich bag fell out of the dad’s pocket and landed underneath the slide. The dad hopped off of the slide, scooped up the bag and shoved it back in his pocket. I stared at him for a minute, wondering if he’d acknowledge that I’d just totally seen his bag of weed. He didn’t. Instead he reached in his pocket, pulled out a few more bags in addition to the first and put them in a different pocket on the leg of his shorts, a pocket that closed with velcro.

    A family shuffled up the walkway to the playground. There were two mildly retarded looking adults, a man and a woman, with a boy who looked to be about six or seven years old and a small baby in a carriage. The boy took off playing and the woman and the man sat on the bench with the stroller in front of them. The woman was oddly obese. She wasn’t nearly as large as the woman with the little girl in tap shoes, but she had a lumpy pendulous belly and she was wearing a bizarre cotton tie dyed overall shorts thing. She wasn’t wearing a shirt. The ill-fitting overalls only partially covered her stretched out, shiny white bra and back fat. She and the guy settled onto the bench and immediately took out their cell phones. It looked like they were playing games with them, and every so often they’d show each other something on the phone. The woman smiled at the Fiendling and asked me his age. I told her he’s almost a year and a half and she responded that her baby would be five months old tomorrow. I smiled and winced while she exhaled cigarette smoke into her baby’s carriage. A few minutes later she asked, “How do you spell minutes?” I spelled it for her and she thanked me and went back to pressing buttons on her phone.

    A normal looking guy wearing an orange polo shirt arrived with his son who appeared to be about four or five. The dad said to his kid, “You’re one of the big kids here today, watch out for the little ones.” A few minutes later I turned around and saw that the dad was on his back on the ground, legs up on the low wall, doing sit ups. Sit ups. At the playground. He and his son didn’t stay for too long.

    The Fiendling was walking around the perimeter of the playground when a little girl of about two came into the playground with her mom and they sat on a bench together. The mom looked a bit crunchy and was wearing a shirt that said something about Darwin. The little girl wanted to play with the Fiendling and kept yelling, “Come here little boy. Come play.” Eventually the girl got up and she and the Fiendling began to play, climbing up the ladder and going down the slide.

    A blonde woman smoking a cigarette and a white guy with a stocking on his head walked in to the play area and sat with the obese woman wearing the bra instead of a shirt. They talked for a couple of minutes then the obese woman and the guy she was with left, leaving the older boy and the baby with the blonde and the guy with the do rag.

    The little girl wearing the ruffled socks and fancy shoes came over and seemed to want to play too. She stepped up onto the wall and yelled, “Look at me! Look! I can balance while I walk! WATCH ME!” I said, “I’m watching,” and she began to walk on it like a balance beam. Every few minutes she’d yell again for us to watch. She eventually got bored of the balance routine and started climbing up the slide while the Fiendling and the other little girl tried to go down. I kept telling her that she had to wait for the kids to come down before she climbed up. Her mother and father sat on the bench at the far side of the playground and didn’t seem to be paying any attention whatsoever. On her way up the slide she announced that her shoes had very high heels. When she reached the top she showed me just how high they were and slid back down. She sat at the foot of the slide and asked the Fiendling if he’d like to sit with her. He sat and she pointed out her shoes to him. He seemed to like the sparkles and touched them. He soon lost interest and began climbing the ladder again. Wanting more attention the girl stopped him at the bottom of the slide and asked if he wanted to sit and pet her shoes. I was relieved that he did not.

    It was close to seven at this point and the Fiendling was exhausted. Not wanting to upset him by leaving the playground Boyfiend waited for the exact right moment and scooped him up and skipped down the hill singing a little song. We sang the song about the marching ants all the way to the supermarket where we bought a loaf of Le Bus bread before heading home to feed the Fiendling and put him to bed.

    Boyfiend put the baby to sleep while I made a quick tomato sauce (over white beans for me and spaghetti for him) for dinner. I went outside to pick some basil and found this on the ground.

    Stupid raccoons. I guess it’s time to break out more coyote urine.

    Fiendling
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    “#@%* RACCOONS!”

    For the low, low price of $22.95 I am the proud owner of:

    If this doesn’t work I don’t know what will. I hope my eggplants are still there when we get back from vacation.

    garden
    odds and ends

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    Apology

    Dear Squirrel,

    I still don’t like you and I still blame you for eating my green bean seedlings. However I must apologize for calling you fuckers for eating my eggplant. I’m sorry. It was not you. It was a motherfucking raccoon. A fucking raccoon, squirrel. In my garden, eating my eggplant.
    My sincerest apologies,

    Girlfiend

    p.s. I still don’t want you in my garden. Back off.

    garden
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    Squirrels

    I believe I’ve mentioned before that squirrels are fuckers. I hate them. Lower Merion has a deer hunt, my backyard should have a squirrel hunt. This time they’ve eaten my cute little not even as big as ping pong ball eggplant. I may have to buy some fox urine. I can’t believe I just typed that and meant it.

    I have hobbies
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    And a few more things

    I ate the first green beans from my garden last night. Haricots verts. I dropped them in boiling water for about a minute then tossed them with olive oil, kosher salt, pepper and minced garlic. They were the best green beans I’ve ever eaten. Fresh makes a world of difference.

    I finished Shopaholic and Baby last night. I do not get the Shopaholic series. I read Shopaholic and Sister, thought it was terrible, saw the baby book and couldn’t resist. It was equally as terrible, if not worse.

    The first pepper turned orange. It looks like it will be red soon.

    I have hobbies
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    The garden report

    The unidentified peppers are officially out of control but I don’t know when to pick them. They seem too big to be Serrano, not lumpy enough to be the California Chile, and not yellow enough to be banana peppers, but maybe they’ll turn yellow if I leave them long enough? I don’t know.

    I have two green pepper plants (California Wonder bell peppers they say, but who believes the labels anymore?) that are slowly growing. One is starting to get little blooms. The one banana pepper (so it says, but again, you can’t believe what you read) plant is also getting little blooms.

    The eggplants have survived all aphid attacks and are currently flowering, which I hope means eggplants to come. The blossoms are beautiful purple and are oddly spiky. They hurt.

    The zucchini (yellow, and definitely considered zucchini) is pathetic. Right now I have one measly, spindly little guy about 4 inches big, a bunch of male blossoms and a couple of less than an inch long zukes that appear to have rotted well before their time. More blossoms appear to be on the horizon, but I have little faith.

    My green beans (the skinny, french variety) are flowering like crazy.

    Tomatoes, planted after weeks of sitting in my father-in-law’s backyard, appear to be growing slowly. Nothing yet, but I have faith.

    The basil is officially too much. I have hours of pesto making in my future. Somehow the two measly little basil transplants have become 5 enormous monsters. I’ve been trying not to use it to discourage growth but it’s not working.

    Aphids are easily controlled by swift application of the garden hose. Squirrels hate me. They have eaten all of my cilantro seeds and a few green bean seedlings I planted after the first round. They’ve also eaten a geranium. Fuckers.

    The rose of sharon is in bloom but the tiger lilies have sort of crapped out on me- two bloomed, but the rest are just standing there, threatening to, while the rest of the neighborhood’s lilies have been in bloom for weeks. Of the annuals, the petunias, impatiens, begonias and coleus are doing well and the geraniums look like shit. I blame the lack of full sun as well as the squirrels.

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    Incorrectly labeled

    These peppers from my garden were labeled jalapeños,  yet look completely different. I’ve not yet tasted them but they smell hot. Any ideas?

    And the zucchini? Clearly, it’s not green as I originally expected.

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    Yes!

    Twice this week I’ve cheered out loud after managing to get a piece of newspaper or junkmail under the cat just in time to catch the vomit.

    The Fiendling’s cast came off this afternoon. The sawing was traumatic for him, as were the subsequent x-rays, but it’s off and he’s healed and ready to go. He took off walking almost immediately with a slight limp, but I think I’d be limping too if my leg had been immobilized for the past three weeks.

    My jalapeños are still growing like crazy and the zucchini’s beginning to flower. The bean seeds I planted sprouted and only one’s been eaten by a squirrel so far. Since this post is about yeses I’m sort of reticent to mention that I think the eggplants may be goners thanks to the stupid aphids, but time will tell.

    I finished a sleeve on the sweater I started for months and months ago. It looks like shit close up, but I finally got the hang of knitting in the round with double pointed needles so hopefully the second sleeve will look better.

    I need book recommendations. Fiction or non-fiction that reads like fiction. Any suggestions? Take a look at my 50 Books page to see what I’ve been reading.

    Fiendling
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    Figures

    It occurred to me, after I transplanted a few plants and planted some seeds for green beans, that most of my veggies will be ready to harvest while I’m away on vacation in July. I’ve been using the herbs as needed though, and a few other vegetables should be ready sooner. Like these jalapeños:

    Unless the stupid aphids eat them first.

    While I’m posting pictures, does anyone know what this bush is?

    I have hobbies
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